The Hype of Twilight

Fortunately or not, depending upon your point of view, Twilight has become a bona fide cultural phenomenon, thrusting vampires into the limelight like nothing else in recent years. Now, I love vampires as much as the next gal, but I'm not sure I understand the complete madness that surrounds this particular set of vampires. Excuse me, this particular set of *sparkly* vampires. It seems that just the sight of Rpatz (that’s Robert Pattinson for those of us gratefully beyond our teenage years), with his tasseled, unwashed hair and suspiciously dilated eyes, can send tweens into a state of hysteria unseen since Beatlemania.

To be honest, I read Twilight. I enjoyed it too, at the time. It’s somewhat hard to remember that innocent enjoyment now, what with my allergy to over-hype. But it seems we’ve finally reached a point in all the Twilight-mania where my enjoyment can return. That point, my friends and patrons, is the backlash.

Oh, how I love snark.

On November 4, The Harvard Lampoon released the Twilight parody, Nightlight. The first chapter is available online through Entertainment Weekly, and proves to be mildly entertaining. For those familiar with both Stephenie Meyer’s infamous series, and the movies it’s spawned, Nightlight may prove to be a breath of fresh air in a fandom that's getting rather stuffy with fanaticism.




My favorite part of this parody? Waiting to see the outraged response from the Super Fans. Now THAT will be amusing.

~Gretchen

Sick of Being Sick? 13 Suggestions to Get You Better, Quick!

Header by Samulli

I don’t know about you, but I’m sick of being sick. Weeks ago I caught a doozy of a cold. I shared it with my family and we passed the virus around until I caught it again. After feeling sorry for myself, I decided to use my computer to find ways I could speed my recovery. I found these suggested remedies and ways to stay healthy.
I figured you’d want to know. …

1. Wash your hands. WebMD states, “Amazingly, about 80% of contagious diseases are transmitted by touch.”
2. If you sneeze, don’t cover your nose or mouth with your hands. You can spread germs that way. Use a tissue instead or the crook of your arm.
3. Get fresh air. Inside air may be re-circulated and may actually expose you to even more viruses.
4. Drink water. It’ll help you flush out the virus and keep you hydrated.
5. Don’t touch your face. You don’t want to spread the germs from your hands.
6. Exercise. Being active bolsters your immune system.
7. Get rest. Getting enough sleep is another way to boost your immune system.
8. Eat vegetables. Especially the dark green leafy ones. They contain phytochemicals which build up your body’s immunity.
9. Don’t smoke. You already know that smoking’s hard on your lungs, but did you know smoking dries out your nasal cavities and prevents those little cleaning hairs in your lungs from filtering out viruses?
10. Drink less alcohol. Alcohol dehydrates, which makes it harder for your body to rid itself of the virus.
11. Take cod-liver-oil tablets. They’re loaded with Vitamins A and D, which help the immune system.
12. Take Vitamin C within the first 24 hours that symptoms appear. Again, the idea is to rev up your immune system.
13. Consider herbal remedies such as garlic, ginger, oregano, lemon or even horseradish. For generations people have applied these home cures and many still claim they work.

I’m determined to get over my cold as fast as possible. Do you have any suggestions? What has worked for you?

Sources
http://www.preventtheflu.com/ http://www.webmd.com/cold-and-flu/cold-guide/12-tips-prevent-cold-flu http://nutrition.about.com/od/foodfun/a/flu_foods.htm

Meet Gretchen Stull

This past couple of weeks, we've added 2 employees to the Diner Staff. Last week we met Annie Solomon and this week we're meeting Gretchen Stull, who's our special Graveyard Shift waitress. Gretchen doesn't work full time -- we only open for the late shift on special nights -- but her first post will be this coming Friday.

***

1) Briefly, who are you as an author and what do you write?

As an author, I am dark and mysterious. Wait no, no that's not me, that's someone else entirely.

I'm pretty much the same, as an author and just as myself. I like to venture into dark territory at times, but only if there's humor to be found in it. I'm more of a cynic than an optimist, but I fully believe in happy endings. I prefer anti-heroes to heroes, and alpha males to any other kind, but I still like characters who are intrinsically good and who'll do the right thing when presented with a choice.

That's what I like about paranormal romance, which is what I write. It can be dark, it can be gritty, it can be emotional, but it can be funny and reaffirming at the same time.

2) What do you do (voluntarily) when you're not writing?

I like to sleep. I'm a big fan of sleep!

When not writing, slaving away at my day job, or sleeping, I like to sew and make clothing, watch movies, read for fun, attend concerts, and travel.

3) What's your favorite deadline snack?

As much as I hate to admit it, when I'm on a deadline I head straight for the junkfood. Deadline snacks have to be fast and easy because I don't want the act of cooking or going to a nicer restaurant to waste any potential writing time. So that means hitting up a fast food establishment for meals (McDonalds fries and iced coffee often became the meal of choice during thesis-writing hell), and as for actual snacking, I like the snacks that mix salty and sweet. Kettle Corn has often kept my laptop and I company on those long, lonely deadline nights.

4) What is it about paranormal romance? How do you feel paranormal elements enhance the romance and vice versa?

Paranormal romance captures my imagination like no other stories out there. I think paranormal elements enhance all relationships and interactions within paranormal stories, not just the romantic relationships. No matter how mundane an action or interaction may be, when it's skewed by a paranormal element (be it a paranormal being or setting), the stakes are upped. Paranormal stories usually contain closely guarded secrets and life or death stakes. A wrong move doesn't just ruin a relationship, it can jeopardize a life or even the safety of an entire group of beings. I think those kind of stakes make characters more cautious of entering into romantic relationships and render the final decision to make that plunge into a monogamous romantic relationship an act of bravery all its own.

5) Authors also tend to be devoted readers. What authors do you read for inspiration and/or enjoyment?

I love JR Ward's Black Dagger Brotherhood series. To be completely honest, her Dark Lover was the first true paranormal romance book I ever read. It's what got me hooked! I think Neil Gaiman is nothing short of brilliant, I read Stardust as a teenager and it's been my favorite book ever since. Max Brooks' World War Z is a book I recommend to everyone, it just works on so many levels. Those are really at the top of my list, though I also greatly enjoy the works of Charlaine Harris, JK Rowling, Lauren Willig, and Janet Evanovich as well.

6) What is your biggest "collection" (besides books)?

DVDs. I have an embarrassing amount of DVDs lying around. I've always loved movies and I used to freelance as a film critic for a small newspaper in Alabama. I also studied film in college and grad school so, yeah, I have more than my fair share of movies.

7) What were your favorite childhood (as in pre-teen, even) books or movies? Can you spy the seeds of paranormal romance budding even then?

Oh, the seeds of paranormal romance were sown early, even if I didn't realize it at the time. When I was 9, NBC decided to revive the old soap opera, Dark Shadows. It was an abysmal failure that lasted only 13 episodes, but the damage was done. I was hooked. Ive been a vampire addict ever since.

After Dark Shadows, I became obsessed with the X-Men cartoon that showed on Fox in the mid 1990s. During my freshman year of college, it was Dark Angel, followed soon after by Smallville, Special Unit 2, and Firefly. Futuristic, paranormal, and science fiction shows, laced with romantic tension, have always been my favorite. Im eagerly awaiting True Blood, season 3.

8) What paranormal book or movie would you like to be dropped into the middle of, to experience the world if not the entire plot?

Honestly, if I could only choose one, I would choose the Harry Potter world. Even though that probably sounds a little juvenile, the world Rowling created in those books is so multilayered and fascinating. I would love to experience that world as a witch, I doubt it would be as much fun as a muggle.

9) If you had to have a lifesize standee of a character in a paranormal tv series, movie or book in your bedroom at all times, who would it be and how would other residents of your household probably feel about it?

If I had to have one, which is the only way I would, it would likely be a lifesize standee of Vampire Eric Northman from True Blood, and likely it would be a present from my friend Kristen who tends to turn up with odd things like that.

As for the other residents of my home? My boyfriend would probably notice it once, roll his eyes at me, and then promptly begin using it as a clothes hanger. Brady the dog would be terrified of it, because he is terrified of everything. And Simon the cat would use it to sharpen his nonexistent claws while glowering menacingly at the dog.

10) What is some of the most unusual research you've done for your fiction?

For my nonfiction writing I've gone to some lengths, including becoming a regular at a Georgia strip club, but my fiction research has been far tamer. A lot of reading up on mythology from around the globe and using Google Earth, nothing too exciting or bizarre.

11) If you were deprived of your computer for a year and had no looming deadline, would you write your next book in longhand anyway or keep notes and wait until you had a computer again to finish it?

I tend to write a lot of my stories and ideas longhand now, so I'd definitely write longhand. I find it slows me down enough that I can really flesh out my characters as I'm writing. Now, when I'm really on a roll I prefer typing it out, but if I'm experiencing writer's block, writing longhand is one of the ways I get through it.

12) If you could have a little-known superpower, what one would you pick and why? What one would your friends and loved ones pick FOR you?

If I could have any little-known superpower, I'd choose Super Insomnia. I would be able to exist without ever sleeping (unless I chose to sleep) and would have no ill effects like sleep deprivation to cloud my judgment. Do you have any idea how much I could accomplish in a day if I didn't have to sleep? It would be wonderful. I'd call myself Productivity Gal.

When I asked my boyfriend this question, he said he'd choose flight. We like to travel, and if I could fly we'd get places more quickly. Of course, continuous motion tends to put me to sleep (which should further explain my desire for Super Insomnia), so he put in a stay awake while flying addendum to the power of flight.

13) Anything else you'd like to share with visitors to the Diner?

Hmm, I think the patrons are just going to have to stop by to know me better :)

***

Jody W.
www.jodywallace.com * www.meankitty.com

On Your Mark. Get Set. Go!

Yesterday, at 12:01 am, NaNoWriMo officially began. For those of you not in the know, that’s National Novel Writing Month. Registered writers have until midnight Nov. 30th to write a 175 page, 50,000 word novel. That’s technically more like a novella, but the folks at http://www.nanowrimo.org/ wanted to make it a doable goal for people. The majority of writers could never churn out a true 100,000 word novel in a month (Sherrilyn Kenyon, Gena Showalter and other author goddesses are the exception – they are paranormal creatures themselves, requiring little, if any, sleep to live).

This is my first ever attempt at this undertaking. Yes, I’m a NaNo virgin. Please be gentle with me. In order to meet the 50K goal in a month, authors need to average 1,667 words per day to stay on track. For me, I know my weekends are often iffy for writing productivity, so I have to try to get more like 2400 words a day, 5 days a week to keep up. I don’t think I’ve ever written that much on a daily basis in my life, but I’m gonna try. Afterall, the writing is not expected to be perfect. It's not called the shitty first draft for nothing.

So how did I do my first day? Not so well. I blame it on a rainy, miserable day with both my husband and two bored children trapped in the house with me. I only got 393 words done yesterday. But I just have to remember that I’m aiming to hit my writing goals during the weekdays while the kids are in school and anything done on the weekend is bonus material. Yesterday was Sunday, so technically NaNo in my household starts today and I’m already 393 words ahead. Yippee! Now let’s just see if I can do my 2400 words today and keep it up for the rest of the week. I’ll let you know how it goes.

So, have we got any other NaNos at the diner?

Happy Halloween - gothic romance style

Happy Halloween to one and all!

Halloween is one of my favorite holidays. I'm not sure why exactly. When I was little I loved dressing up and going from house to house to collect candy. Even in my teens I liked the dressing up part, though I didn't do the candy collection thing.

Maybe it's something about putting on a costume and being someone other than who you really are. On Halloween you can be anyone...or anything. The possibilities are endless for someone with a vivid imagination. Since I joined the SCA (Society for Creative Anachronism) in the 1990s I usually go with being a "medieval lady" for Halloween. It's a quick and easy costume. But I still love the "be whoever you want to be" aspect of the holiday.

I also enjoy being scared and Halloween provides a safe outlet for feeling and expressing fear. My first brush with feeling safely scared (outside of trick or treating) was reading gothic romance. Those great books where the heroine fell in love with a dark, brooding and compellingly dangerous man.

As a reader you were pretty sure he was the hero and wouldn't kill her, but the heroine wasn't nearly so sure. She was attracted to him but she was frightened by him too. I avidly read Victoria Holt when I was in my teens and she was a master at creating an eerie story where the heroine was in danger and didn't know who to trust.

I loved Jane Eyre for this same reason. There was a mysterious and intense connection between Jane and Rochester. But...there was a nameless evil lurking in the house. A danger that stalked Jane. I loved the fact that Jane was so intrepid. She saved herself and then went back to face her fears.

I think it was gothic romance that fed my love of paranormal romance. Because even more dangerous than a dark brooding lord of the manor is a dark, brooding lord of the manor with fangs. There was something strangely compelling about Dracula - even as over-the-top as Bela Lugosi played him. Dracula seemed to be someone who controlled others yet loved deeply.

This was especially true when I saw the 1979 version of Dracula starring Frank Langella. I was sixteen but even though the movie was rated R, I got in because I looked old enough to go. Frank Langella was nummy and I was ready to open a vein if he asked. Trevor Eve, who played Jonathon Harker, was good looking but really whiney - NOT hero material. Langella rocked the screen.

I was deeply affected by this film because it was one of the first times I remembered Dracula portrayed as a flawed individual who was dangerous but not necessarily inherently evil. He was seductive and strong. He could have had any woman but he was committed to Lucy and protective of her. It made him very appealing.

Another Dracula that made an impression was Gary Oldman's portrayal. He did the creepy aspect of Dracula very well. Licking Keanu Reeves blood off the razor blade while wearing the weird hair, or wig or whatever, was definitely repulsive. But even in that form, he was intriguing. When he traveled to England and began to romance Mina...wow. He was suddenly human. A man in love with a woman instead of a vamp in search of his next meal.

I loved the ending of this movie too. To find out what had turned him into a vampire in the first place was both romantic and heartbreaking. This was a great movie.

So do you have favorite gothic or paranormal romances in book or movie form? What do you like best about a gothic or paranormal hero or heroine? What appeals to you about Halloween?

Gretchen Stull, Waitress (Graveyard Shift)

A professional night owl, Gretchen just couldn’t resist the “Help Wanted – Graveyard Shift” sign hanging in the Otherworld Diner window. After chatting up the regulars (and a bit of begging), she was hired. Now she happily serves up delicious food with a side of witty repartee, keeping a mental record of all her encounters for use as future story fodder.

Usually off in a fantasy world of her own creation, Gretchen prefers tales of the paranormal, especially when those tales involve vampires and zombies. She’s not opposed to a healthy dose of romance or dark humor either. Her stories of paranormal romance follow a general recipe of one part alpha male, one part feisty heroine, and one part supernatural setting, blended together on high with a dollop of sarcasm and fresh suspense to taste. Best served hot!

As for Lily Ghates? That’s just an alter-ego. All eccentrics have one.

Why Not SciFi?

I was poking around the Diner in preparation for my first inspection when I ran across this little item buried in a corner: “‘Dollhouse’ swept off the air for sweeps month.”

Dollhouse, of course, is the Joss Whedon TV show about an underground organization that provides its high paying clients with any fantasy they want—in the person of men or women whose brains are repeatedly wiped of all memory and then loaded with whatever personality the client requires. This allows the star, Eliza Dushku, to take on a different character every show.

Which, is a cool idea.

Or would be if someone else was playing the part. But Dushku just doesn’t have the depth or smarts to carry it off. I know she’s a Whedon favorite and that she’s supposedly sexy as all get out, but to me she comes across as “playing” a part rather than inhabiting it. A valley girl out of her depth.

So maybe that explains, in part, why the show has been touted in the media as a “cult-favorite” (translation: beloved by a fanatic few), and characterized as “struggling” for viewers. And why Fox decided to replace the show during November sweeps with reruns of Bones and House.

Or maybe it’s just that this kind of show, which, despite its flaws, is still imminently watchable, can’t find an audience. I have two sisters and a brother and I couldn’t pay either of them to watch Dollhouse or Firefly or Moonlight or any scifi/paranormal series.

Remember Jericho or Invasion? I loved those shows. They were well-written and spectacularly performed and directed, and yet they still bit the dust before their time.

So, I thought this would be an appropriate way to start my stint at the Diner:

What’s the deal?

Why do so many people hate scifi?

If there’s a vampire involved, man you can’t keep them away. Ditto with the kids and wizardry. But take a grown up and put him in a strange, alien world, well, that’s just silly.

Which is why I’m extremely interested to see how the alien-invasion show “V” does next week.

And why I’ll wait with resignation for Dollhouse’s November hiatus to end and the rest of the show to air in December. Fox has decided to broadcast it in 2-hour blocks. Does that sound like a lot of hurry up and finish to you?

Another one bites the dust.

***

Annie Solomon
http://www.anniesolomon.com/

A Lesson in Writing from....The Beatles

I love The Beatles. I am old enough to remember playing a board game based on the Fab Four (I was Ringo but always wanted to be Paul) and my very first musical purchase was the single, "The Long and Winding Road." I was young...and it cost me 79 cents. Yup, that was a whole lot of money back in those days.

Anyhow, my excitement at the remastered version of "A Hard Day's Night" scared people. I walked into my local Blockbuster...heard the music and saw the four guys from Liverpool. They were so beautiful-- all crisp and clear.The sound blew me away.

I wept. I wept right there next to their Rockband setup.

It was a beautiful thing.

Of course I purchased it. Watched it and salivated over every extra feature on the disc. I squealed over every tidbit of information about the boys that I had never known. ( I was pretty young back in those days.)

Between jumping up and down screaming, "I love Paul" and hugging my old vinyl albums, I stopped.
George Martin, famed Beatle producer, was saying something...something that thwapped my writer's brain with a Bart Simpson-like "D'oh!"

The original recording of the song, "Can't Buy Me Love" isn't what you know, love and listen to today. The original song started with:

"I'll buy you a diamond ring, my friend...."

Martin liked the song. It was...nice. Good beat, cute lyrics and a catchy melody. But something was missing and he told the boys so. The song just didn't grab grab him right off the bat. He wanted more. So Martin asked them to change it.

Start it off with a a bang....

Start it off with the chorus.

Yup. Think about it.

"Can't buy me love..."

Bammo! You're in the song. Lyrically you want to know the why and how that can't buy me love. Musically, you're up on your feet and dancing before you've even reach the dance floor.

Genius. Total genius.

Now, apply that genius to your manuscript. Does your manuscript start too early? Begin with the "nice" or "meh?" Listen to George Martin. Start it off with a bang! Suck in those readers so that they'll be on chapter two before they realize that they're still standing in the bookstore.

If John, Paul, George and Ringo can do it, so can you.

And the rest, as they say, is history.



Happy Writings,
Talia